My name is Savannah Lee. I am an 18 year old college student freshman at Florida State University. I have been experiencing the “college life”, going out with several friends and doing what most college students do. Growing up I have had very informative parents who have never sheltered me in telling me that the world is this beautiful place full of all decently nice human beings. In fact as much as I would like to believe this world is incredibly generous, there is so much bad along with all of the good. Unfortunately some of my friends’ parents haven’t necessarily been as open with them. These friends of mine have no idea what intentions humans are capable of having and that is a very sad thing to me. Some of these friends had no idea that guys would slip a drug into their drink behind their back. These friends didn’t know that you NEED a friend, a good friend, to be around you at all times while you’re drinking. These friends didn’t know that a boy would offer so kindly to take them home and then ditch them in the morning once they got what they wanted. As I have previously mentioned, I am fortunate. I am well aware of these things and I have been cautious for quite some time now. I had a friend come up to me today telling me she had a terrible weekend. She didn’t go to classes yesterday and I was concerned but I figured she was just sick. My friend was raped. She said this:
“It’s fine I’ve told my mom and everything and it’s fine I don’t want to talk about it”.
I’m writing this out of genuine pain. How can someone say, “it’s fine”… Has our generation become so accustomed to such repulsive acts of violence that we see it as okay? No, being taken advantage of is NOT “fine”. No, it is NOT fair. No, it is NOT okay. She claims it was her fault because she drank too much and she can’t even remember the night. HOW is it her fault that a man took her clearly incoherent self to his apartment and used her body as a tool?
I don’t think my writing will suddenly change the world and rape will no longer exist. In fact I doubt the majority of people to read this article will be men. However I will say this, if you are a parent please do as mine did. Tell your kid what is happening. Teach them that not everything in life is a walk of sunshine. Teach them that people can be cruel and that it is SO important especially for women to keep their guard up. Parents to boys, please do your best to teach them respect. As it is a minimal act, make them open doors for women. Allow them to see women as precious and not objects.
When a boy I am not sure of touches me I automatically feel slight discomfort. The thought of someone completely using my body to their disturbing advantage makes me want to throw up.
A few days ago as I left my dorm room a boy who lives in my hall said “Hey nice leggings they accentuate your ass”. I’ve never in my life spoken to this boy. I don’t know what exactly went through his head as he said this. I certainly don’t know who raised him to believe a comment so degrading is okay to say. This one line from this stranger’s mouth ruined my morning. I felt like absolutely nothing for a solid ten minutes. I figured, “Wow this boy sees nothing but my body all because I am dressed in workout clothes before this ballet class”…. I thought to myself “I should’ve worn sweat pants over this leotard instead of leggings.” Are you serious? Why should I have to change my wardrobe just because a boy doesn’t have any sense of respect?
Parents, please talk to your kids.
Kids, I know I am still new to this world and finding my way but it is imperative to keep your guard up and know who is a friend, how to protect yourself, and stay confident.
Women, you are beautiful strong individuals regardless of what some boy down the hall may say to you.
Disrespectful little boys, get your shit together.
Men who are real men, thank you.
savleesickmon 